England went out of the World Cup last night, 2-1 to Argentina in Atlanta, two late goals. That is all the football you're getting from us, because the more interesting match happened on this morning's front pages. * The Sun went with "Wonderbawl" over a photo of Harry Kane with his head in his hands, and the line: "It's 60 years of hurt as brave Lions sunk by late Argie goals." Look at the grammar for a second. The Lions are "brave." The goals are "late." The sinking simply happens to England, like weather. Not one person in an England shirt makes a single decision anywhere in that sentence. * (Also: "Argie." It's 2026 and the Sun is still wearing its Falklands-era nickname like a regimental badge. Different piece, same paper.) * Now the Guardian, covering the identical 90 minutes. Barney Ronay wrote that "Harry Kane basically did some light cardio quite close to a World Cup semi-final." Jacob Steinberg's verdict: England "looked scared to win." Where the Sun saw brave Lions ambushed by fate, the Guardian saw eleven men actively committing a defeat — with the captain's shift downgraded from national tragedy to gym session. * Same crying man on both pages. The Sun framed the tears as a monument. The Guardian invoiced them. * And here's the tell that even the Sun doesn't buy its own front page: inside the same paper, Kyle Walker's column says of Tuchel, "I don't see much difference from when he was in charge to what we've done at this World Cup" — "he" being Southgate. That's a blame quote. So fate did it on page one, and the manager did it a few pages later. Pick a lane, lads. * None of this is really about football. "Brave Lions sunk" versus "scared to win" is the entire framing playbook demonstrated in one newsstand: passive voice for our boys, active voice for their failures, and both versions written by people who watched the same match. Sixty years of hurt, and still no agreement on who, grammatically, does the hurting.