Andy Burnham has been Prime Minister for two days, which in Daily Mail time is long enough to run up a tab. Their sketch this morning: "Sacked Starmerite echoes the nation and asks... who's going to pay the bill for Andy's largesse?" * Largesse. Lovely word. It means the man is showering the nation with gifts — and the Mail helpfully totted up the receipt: a shopping list it reckons could hit taxpayers for hundreds of billions of pounds, with Reform's Robert Jenrick on hand to declare that "Burnham's numbers don't add up." * Now look at what's actually IN the bag versus what's still on the shelf. Raising the income tax threshold? Floated. Nationalising utilities? Looked at. A national care service? Advocated. The Mail's invoice doesn't distinguish between things Burnham bought and things he picked up, turned over, and put back down. It's costing the browsing. * Which brings us to Bloomberg, same story, same day: "Burnham Rules Out Raising UK Income Tax Threshold in Early Fiscal Plans." The single biggest item on the Mail's receipt — the tax cut for millions of workers — was already being walked back while the ink dried, because Burnham is busy trying to look boring for skeptical bond markets. Gilt yields hit highs this week; nothing cures largesse faster than a bond trader raising an eyebrow. * To be fair to the Mail: asking a brand-new PM how he'll pay for things is the job. Burnham did tell his own first Cabinet meeting his government would always "show how we are going to pay for it," so the question is fair game. The trick is in the tense — the Mail wrote the story as if the spree had happened. Bloomberg wrote it as a man at the checkout quietly handing items back to the cashier. * One outlet covered a spending spree. The other covered a returns queue. Same customer, same shop, same morning — the only difference is which paper needed him to have already blown the money.