The Sun's front page this morning: "Fury at footie 'nuclear bomb': FOR SALE." A headline with everything — fury, an explosion, capital letters — everything except one single googleable noun. Who's furious? What's for sale? Who's buying? The Sun knows. The front page isn't telling. * The story, one sentence: FIFA announced on Tuesday that it wants to spin the World Cup and its other crown jewels into a commercial company called FIFA Forward Enterprise — a $20 billion valuation, $4.2 billion to be raised from private investors this year, with Joshua Kushner's firm Thrive Eternal on the intended-investor list — and UEFA went nuclear (their metaphor, we'll get to it) within hours. * Now look at CNN's headline on the identical story: "FIFA plan for Kushner-backed $20 billion operation to run World Cup meets fury from Europe's UEFA." Every load-bearing noun, present and accounted for: who (FIFA), what (a $20 billion operation), whose money (Kushner-backed), who's furious (UEFA). It reads like a police report. In this genre, that's a compliment. * The Sun kept only the feelings. And one word is doing the heaviest lifting: "footie." That word takes the largest privatization attempt in the history of sport and shrinks it to the size of a pub grumble. A $20 billion governance coup, wearing a flat cap. * About that "nuclear bomb": in the reporting it's attributed to one unnamed figure. Meanwhile UEFA's actual on-the-record statement was colder and, honestly, better: "It is not FIFA's to sell. None of us are the owners of football." A named institution, in writing, with follow-up: "The soul and governance of football are not assets to trade — especially with zero transparency as to who gains financially." The front page went with the anonymous guy's explosion anyway. On-record beats anonymous everywhere in journalism — except, apparently, in the layout meeting. * And the detail worth the whole story, reported by The Times and carried in CNN's piece: a CEO-like commissioner role at the new company "could be created for Infantino" once his FIFA presidency ends in 2031. FIFA's response is a little duet with itself: "This has never been discussed," says sentence one. "The FIFA president and the FIFA administration will and must have leading roles in this entity — if approved," says sentence two. Never discussed. Also mandatory. Same press release. * A tabloid front page that yells is not news — yelling is the format, and when The Sun yells about football, Britain listens. That's exactly why the missing nouns matter. Fury is useful to a reader only if it comes with an address: a name, a number, a company you can look up. "Fury at footie 'nuclear bomb'" is rage with the shipping label torn off. And fury with no address gets lost in the post.